Monthly Archives: January 2014

My Very First Online Dating Experience

Margarita in a glass

This is a strange story.  So much so, you may not believe it all to be true.  But, I promise you, it is.

I met my date at a popular Mexican restaurant, known for their potent margaritas, about 30 minutes away from my house.  Not quite sure what to expect, as I was very new into the dating world again.  The first thing I noticed was that he was a handsome man, but could do without the heavy gold jewelry (Rolex, bracelet and necklace) he was wearing.  I thought, that’s easy to change, I’ll give him a chance.  We hit it off right away and conversation flowed well.  We talked about traveling and the places we’ve been and would like to go to.  This is where it started to get weird, and should’ve been my first clue.  He mentioned Hedonism was his favorite destination.  OK, I thought.  It’s not my style, but there’s definitely a market for it, otherwise it wouldn’t be popular.  From there, he said he wanted to take me to a swingers bar after our drinks.  “No thanks”, I said.  Still feeling the need to be polite, which in hindsight was silly, I stayed and continued chatting with him.  A little while later, he excused himself to the restroom.  When he returned, he pretended to shake my hand.  In that handshake he handed me a ball of white powder in a baggie.  Being naive, I asked what it was.  He said cocaine.  Yikes!  I’m not sure how I put off the vibe that I’d be interested in that, or anything else he mentioned.  At that point, I decided that this date wasn’t going in a good direction, so said I needed to leave.  He said that since I’d had a (strong) margarita, I probably shouldn’t drive home; so he booked us a room at a nearby hotel to sleep it off… “No strings”.  I couldn’t get out of there fast enough.  Creeper!  Was this guy for real?  I can’t believe he assumed that I, or anyone else for that matter, would appreciate his offer and actually follow through with it!

Fast forward about 6 months.  I received a random text from him.  Keep in mind that I never heard from or spoke to him after the first date.  The text said “I’m going to Cancun next week and need a date.  Wanna go?”  It’s clear all this guy was after.  I’ve learned that not everyone that is dating online has the same intention of finding someone to love.

Stretching the Truth


His online profile description said he was a banker, with an athletic body type and pictures to prove it.  Good looking and successful – those were starting points anyway, albeit shallow, but starting points nonetheless.  We decided to meet.  First off, “athletic” is NOT how I would describe him.  Did he misinterpret the question and list his body type as athletic because he played golf?  Well, this guy was carrying at least 20 lbs more than any of his pictures showed.  Did he think I wouldn’t notice?  I’ve never understood the misrepresentation of body type, but have heard dozens of stories from men & women alike that people are not necessarily the same in person as they represent themselves online.

Telling myself that looks aren’t everything; it’s what’s inside that matters, I decided not to run away and would give him the benefit of the doubt.  A few minutes into our conversation, I learn that his occupation as a banker actually translated to his being a bank teller at the bank’s branch inside Albertsons.  Wow, this guy was really creative with his description.

Aside from these ‘slight’ exaggerations, we didn’t have any chemistry, and conversation was seriously lacking.  Waiting as long as I deemed polite, I finally left.  Then he tried to kiss me!  Did he not see how disastrous this date really was? Maybe he was just clueless… or hopeful?  Yuck- not a chance!  As we drove off in our separate directions, I heard a “beep beep” honk to get my attention.  It was him, waving at me from his ancient KIA.  Icing on the cake…

As I write this, I realize how shallow I must sound… overweight bank teller that drives a KIA.  That’s really not what this is about.  I’m not a gold digging, appearances focused girl.  But, chemistry and honesty are two must-haves.